Words

A comment I made today is coming back to haunt me.

Can you relate? I'm pretty sure everyone over the age of three has said something they wished easily retractable.

But words aren't.

Especially when God gets a hold of them.

The comment I made was to my husband who was trying patiently and with little success to encourage me out of a dark place.

I said to him, "If I'm writing out of pure obedience, then the results of my work are in His hands. Not mine."

Hopefully you weren't thinking I was going to type out some nasty phrase uttered in anger. I've said those too. But I'm learning to clamp my mouth shut quicker because I've seen the physical pain of angry words.

The quote above was said from my head and it's haunting me because I know the words are true. But my heart and body are still trying hard to "do my part" and make things happen.

And I'm weary.

Weary of Amazon rankings (mine stink). Weary of all the lists and measurements and of working for things that God keeps making clear are out of my control.

So I'm pulling back and asking the Lord to speak to my heart and make the above words ones of faith. Resting faith. The kind that trusts God with the outcome and chooses joyful obedience.

Not white-knuckled working hard to give my all and hope for the best.

I'm actually reading two books right now that are just like our loving Daddy to have dropped into my hands at this exact time because they're both perfect encouragement for where I am.

One is The Restorer by Sharon Hinck. Excellent book. I'm learning from Susan just how big God is and that it's okay to be where I am as long as I don't let the lies keep me from holding on to Jesus.

The other book is Facing Your Giants by Max Lucado. Another great read that God is using to remind me of simple truth that I've too easily forgotten.

So what is God using to speak to your heart right now? What words or books are seeping into your heart and helping you walk this sometimes difficult path?

I wish I had some great word of encouragement to share with you all. Maybe knowing you're not alone in the tough places is enough.

Pray for me, will you? I'd appreciate it so much!