There have been many times in my life where I've wondered if God was listening. And even when I knew that I knew He was, I still wondered if He'd answer.
I don't like those times of doubt and wrestling with God. I don't like knowing I should rest and be at peace and still finding it impossible to do.
I'm so very glad God remembers how frail I really am.
It's a pretty fair guess that any time I'm not blogging for a long stretch, I'm wrestling something out with God.
January is a case in point.
Readjusting to post-holiday life was hard. Homeschooling was hard. And waiting for direction for my writing career was hardest of all.
I was praying. I just didn't realize I was wrestling too.
And the funny thing is I don't have any huge answers yet. But I do have peace. And it came from a rejection letter.
God spoke through a donkey, so I guess He can use a rejection letter too.
I'd spent some time the week before this letter came with a dear friend who listened to me moan, told me some stories about other's journeys, and then told me to keep praying. Just being around her and having her stay in our home left a fragrance of God's peace everywhere.
I want to grow up and be like that someday.
Anyway, had I not had that time with my friend, I'm sure the rejection would have hurt far worse than in did. But all I could think of when I read the closed-door words was that God heard and answered.
And then, a few days later, He filled my inbox with loads of emails talking about how God has used my books to touch lives. Some even said He used my blog too. Talk about a wonderful encouragement.
In every line, I read God's love and experienced His peace.
He's not done with me. And He used some precious folks, many I've never met, to drive that point home in a loving, uplifting, made-me-smile-big sort of way.
You just never know how God is going to use your simple words of encouragement, words fitly spoken at just the right time, to do amazing things.
Your words are gifts. Your life is a treasure. Thank you for sharing with me and being living and beautiful reminders that God is near...listening and smiling.
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4 comments:
Sounds like you've been needing some encouragement lately.
Well, here's a little more.
A blog award for you.
You can find the details here:
http://bethstitch.blogspot.com/2009/02/blog-award-lets-be-friends.html
Amy, I also understand the need for stretches of silence to wrestle things out. Thank you for breaking the silence and glorifying Him!
Hi, Beth! Thanks so much for that blog post and your very sweet award!
Heather, as always, your words challenge and encourage me. Thank you!
Aren't those pieces that are written directly for us so tasty. Sitting back and savoring one of those moments right now .... eating slowly ... not rushing. How cool is He??!!
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